Pink wafer or Tunnocks caramel? Which is the King of the Scottish wafer biscuits?
Our June Miscellany page features some of our most loved biscuits and there was some heated discussion among The Simple Things’ team about which biscuit was best. So we decided the only fair way to settle it was in a head-to-head debate. We’ve pitted two Scottish champions against each other: the pink wafer biscuit and the Tunnocks wafer. Below you can read the (very serious) debates on both sides, and then do cast your vote, on our blog or on our Facebook or Instagram feeds so we can crown one or other the winner. Now it’s over to the biscuits…
The Pink Wafer
Originally created by Crawfords in Edinburgh and latterly by United Biscuits, the pink wafer is a children’s party staple and a secret favourite among adults, too. Who could resist that lighter-than-air first bite and the way the leaves of wafer melt biddably into your mouth?
Built from layers of dyed pink wafer (because it’s nice to make an effort isn’t it?) interlaced with vanilla cream, the pink wafer looks as attractive as it tastes delicately sweet. Chunky, clumpy biscuits (we’re looking at you, Tunnocks) might be satisfying but they’re nothing to look at are they? The pink wafer, meanwhile, brings colour, fine texture and, might we say, a little glamour to a plated array of digestives, Malted Milks and the like. They are the biscuit one can rely on to ‘lift’ the rest of the plate.
So delicate are they, it has often been argued they are more of a cake. Pish and fie is what we say to this; the wafer is a recognised subset of biscuits and what’s more, it fulfils the brief well. If we wanted something chewy, we would buy a flapjack. If we wanted something chocolatey we’d visit a sweetshop instead. Wafer biscuits should be crips, meltingly delicate and light, and the pink wafer ticks every box. This house believes wafers should be wafers.
The Tunnocks Caramel Wafer
When we reach for a biscuit, we don’t want some mimsy bit of confectionery that you could inhale without noticing, we want something filling, something substantial, something that can be dunked briefly in a cup of tea without fear of biscuit decomposition.
If that’s what you demand from your biscuits too then the Tunnocks caramel wafer is the only wafer biscuit to consider. Another Scottish invention (St Andrew’s University has its own Tunnocks Caramel Wafer Appreciation Society - and so it should), it’s been proudly displayed in its geometric gold and red wrapping since 1956.
The bar is made up of five layers of wafer, with four layers of caramel between, wrapped in a thin layer of chocolate. And that’s where it has the edge over the pink wafer. If they’d only thought to dip them in chocolate, pink wafers would not get nearly so stale and slightly soggy as they occasionally do. Not so the Tunnocks.
Secondly, the addition of the sticky caramel gives the Tunnocks a far superior, more architectural make-up. The layers of caramel are chewy enough to bond the wafer successfully so you don’t end up with a lapful of crumbs and it also gives your jaws a bit of a work-out. Because we all know that the best store cupboard treats make your mouth hurt just a little (see also Pickled Onion Monster Munch and Twiglets).
In conclusion, where the pink wafer is an amuse bouche (and amusing it may be) the Tunnocks Caramel Wafer is practically a meal. We rest our case.
These biscuits are the work of Charlotte Farmer. You can buy her artwork at charlottefarmer1.etsy.com or follow her on Instagram, @lottiefarmer7 . You can see more of her biscuit illustrations in our June issue.
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