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Taking Time to Live Well
From messing about on the river to under the sea, this is a soundtrack to joyful times in the water (yes, even the rain...)
Listenhere: Splish, splash, splosh.
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From Am I Overthinking This by Michelle Rial (Chronicle Books)
We’re nearly at the end of our July Unwind issue and our August issue is just around the corner. We hope the issue helped you unwind a little, as well as find some things to inspire and give you hope.
Here’s an image from our back cover, to make you smile. Will it be ok? We’re hoping for the best, too. It usually works out just fine.
Buy this month's The Simple Things - buy, download or subscribeMore from our July issue…
Be ready for staycations this summer with safe products for the whole family from Jason
Most of us love to be out in the sunshine, but we’ll most likely be making the most of our gardens this year. However, overexposure to UV rays can permanently damage our skin. We all know we should be wearing sunscreen, but knowing what to look for in a product and how to use it effectively can be confusing. To help, we’ve put together this guide to choosing sunscreen to keep you and your family safe this summer.
Firstly, always look for a broad spectrum product with a high SPF, which offers both UVA and UVB protection, such as those from Jason. Be sure to apply 20 minutes before going out in the sun, and ideally stay out of the sun between 11am and 4pm.
A study has shown that on average we only apply 25-50% of the amount of sunscreen we are supposed to in one application. We should apply at least 30 ml of sunscreen with every all-over body application: the equivalent of a shot glass full. Be sure to re-apply at least every two hours, even more frequently if you are hitting the (paddling) pool, although most sunscreens these days offer some kind of water resistance. Jason sunscreens are water resistant for 80 minutes*.
As well as protecting your skin from the sun’s UV rays, Jason’s biodegradable formulas feature antioxidant-rich botanicals to help protect, repair and nurture your skin, including green tea, grape seed and olive fruit extracts. Choose from Family SPF45, Kids SPF45, Mineral SPF30 or Facial SPF20.
If you do spend too much time in the sun, soothe skin with Jason Soothing 98% Aloe Vera Gel. Made with soothing, hydrating aloe vera gel, plus allantoin to reduce tenderness and Vitamin B5 to replenish skin. For extra refreshing relief, store the tube in the fridge.
To find out more and buy Jason’s sun care products, visit the summer shop.
*with the exception of the Facial Sunscreen.
Baking, sitting outside with an ice cream, reading… Mackie’s believe that the simple things in life are best
Simplicity is a very much theme that runs through their business, brand and products. Their real dairy ice cream is made with fresh milk, cream and no artificial ingredients and it’s all produced on their fourth- generation family-run farm in Aberdeenshire using milk from their own herd of cows.
Mackie’s also believe that it’s the things that are often overlooked in our hectic, modern lives that matter most. But they’ve recently become more important than ever. In a recent survey, an overwhelming 94% responded “yes” to the question “Would you say you've found a new appreciation for life's simple pleasures since lockdown began?”. And 90% reported that as we leave lockdown, they will actively seek out simple pleasures more often than before.
That’s why Mackie’s are making make summer 2020 the season to seek out, savour and celebrate the simple pleasures in life. They’ll be offering customers ideas and inspiration for how to get little lifts from the simple things in life, as well as opportunities to win a whole host of simple pleasures inspired prizes. To find out more and to enter visit mackies.co.uk/simplepleasures.
In the meantime, if you need a little simple inspiration, the staff of The Simple Things have shared some of their Simple Summer Pleasures…
“Being outdoors at the beginning and end of the day. I like to get up early when it is still cool and potter round my garden. And in the evening, the build up to sunset, with the sound of the dusk chorus, seems to stretch time – it’s a good time for a walk or simply to sit on a bench with a drink in hand and appreciate summer.” Lisa Sykes, Editor
“Stepping out from my tent on to still dewy grass is one of my favourite things about camping in summer, although the crackle of a campfire as the sun goes down is a close second.” Karen Dunn, Commissioning Editor
“Throwing the kids in the car and heading down to the coast to hunt for treasures amongst the rockpools. We don't normally call it a day until the sun starts to set and that's our cue to grab fish and chips for dinner and an ice cream for pudding.” Abbie Miller, Sub Editor
“Going to bed with a good book and a cool drink, with the windows open, when it’s still light. I used to hate going to bed when it was light when I was a child. Now I feel like it’s a stolen part of the day.” Iona Bower, Editor-at-Large
“I love the distant sound of lawn mowers on a Sunday afternoon whilst relaxing with an ice cream or a drink in the garden. The smell of freshly cut grass always reminds me of summer.” Rob Biddiss, Commercial Director
“A stripy deckchair, a shady tree and a good book. Is a cold, alcoholic drink as well too much to ask for?” Jo Mattock, Commissioning Editor
Share your simple summer pleasure with us in the comments below, and don’t forget to visit @mackiesscotland or mackies.co.uk/simplepleasures to win a ‘simple pleasures’ prize every week.
Some simple pleasures are even better for being well paired: a glass of wine and a plate of cheese, coffee and walnut cake, a good book and a comfy chair… But if you’ve never thought of pairing a cup of tea with a scent, you may have been missing out. “Taste and smell are intimately entwined, and when scents and flavours are paired beautifully, they can create fantastic experiences,” says Chantal M’Biki, founder of House of Lilah, specialists in pairing tea blends and candle scents.
Our modern and fast-paced lifestyles don’t always allow time for creative stimulation and that’s what House of Lilah hopes to put right. Whether you want to relax your mind, awaken your senses or stimulate your imagination, there’s a tea and scent pairing that might help. It turns out there’s a bit more to it than matching a cup of Yorkshire Tea with the aroma of a nearby Chocolate Hobnob… Here are a few ideas from Chantal that you can recreate at home for pairing scents with Earl Grey:
Earl Grey is a British classic with a very recognizable floral taste. It’s great for those who want a little caffeine fix without the bitterness. Originally, it was a black tea base flavoured with bergamot oil, delivering a lemon taste with a hint of grapefruit. Nowadays, it’s also produced with a green tea base.
Try a candle with aromatic top notes such as basil, rosemary or sage, which will complement the Earl Grey aromas and can help create an uplifting atmosphere. We’ve created a similar feeling with our House of Lilah Freedom pairings, such as the Tutti Frutti loose leaf tea with the Sun in a Pot soy candle.
If you’d like to read more about Chantal, she appears in our My Day in Cups of Tea page in the July issue, which is on sale now. And if you’re interested in buying any matched teas and candles from House of Lilah she has a few suggestions below:
The Slow Motion candle and Loving Kindness tea is a beautiful duo that brings mindfulness to everyday life. The candle’s citrusy top notes beautifully enhance the orange and cinnamon aromas to induce alertness. The earthy taste of the red rooibos tea echoes the candle’s smoky, woody base notes, to create a warm and enveloping atmosphere conducive to full relaxation and reconnection with yourself.
Our Tomato Leaf candle and Tropical Escape tea is the perfect pair for those who want to open their mind to new horizons. The herbal and slightly bitter sencha green tea intensifies the candle’s leafy green base notes. The tart tomato accents complement the sweet and sour flavours of mango and pineapple, to create an unexpected fruity fusion.
Follow House of Lilah on instagram @houseoflilah_london.
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We have always thought there’s nuffin like a puffin and, like Kelly Keegan, who wrote our Magical Creatures feature about puffins in our July issue, we attribute much of our love for these birds to their association with Puffin Books, which were such a big part of so many of our childhoods. If you were a big fan, you might even have been a member of The Puffin Club, aka a Puffineer.
The club was founded in 1967 by Kaye Webb, then editor of Puffin Books and in its first year more than 16,000 children joined. At its peak it had some 200,000 members. The enamel puffin badge was a big draw, if we remember correctly, but we stayed for the excitement of receiving a copy of the Puffin Post through the letterbox regularly and being invited to VIP Puffin parties, colourful, grand affairs attended by some of the day’s most famous children’s authors and illustrators. Whether you were a proud Puffineer or not, here are a few facts you might like to know about the Puffin Club…
There was a secret Puffin Club greeting for members: “Sniffup”, and a response: “Spotera”. (Try reading them backwards).
Each month, Puffin would hide 50 coded messages in new books all over the country but only members had the code to decipher them.
The Puffin Club’s ‘computer’ was called TOMCAT (Totally Obedient Machine Cannot Actually Think) though all the admin was done with good old-fashioned paper and pencil in reality.
The last Puffin Post was printed in 1989 but there was a brief revival in 2009 when The Book People took it over. Puffineers will tell you it wasn’t a patch on the original, however.
As well as a love of reading, Puffineers joined in with acts of charity, including raising £3,000 to buy a stretch of Yorkshire coastline as a puffin sanctuary in 1972.
Puffin Post always featured a joke. The first one being: “Do you get fur from a skunk? Yes, as fur away as possible.”
Virtuoso violinist Yehudi Menuhin was the second president of the Puffin Club.
Founder members received the gold Puffin badge, but if you weren’t an early adopter (or weren’t born) you would be awarded the black Puffin badge for four continuous years of membership.
To encourage younger members, the Junior Puffin Club was founded with its own mascot, a baby puffin called Smudge, and its own magazine, The Egg.
Puffin Post included regular writing competitions, but in typical seventies educational style, if entries were not considered to be good enough, the Editor would let members know and there would be no winners announced. Harsh, but we like to think that’s what gave us early Puffin Club members the backbone we still enjoy today!
You can read more about puffins (of the feathery variety) on page 15 of our July issue.
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Photography: Tom Crowford. Recipe: Kathy Bishop
Late summer fruit on toast makes a delicious brekfast or a sweet snack for any time
From their smallholding in rural Somerset Kathy Bishop and Tom Crowford enjoy all their orchard has to offer with recipes that capture the season. You can find the rest of the recipes, including sour cherry cocktails and plum and marzipan cakes starting on page 54 of our July issue
Serves 2
10 ripe greengages
75g cream cheese
2½ tsp honey, plus a little extra for drizzling
A pinch of sea salt
4 slices of sourdough bread
A sprig of lavender flowers, divided into tiny individual blooms (optional)
A sprig of bronze fennel flowers, divided into individual blooms (optional)
1 Preheat the oven to 180C/Fan 160C/Gas 4. Halve and stone the greengages. Put them in a single layer in a roasting tin, skin side down, and pop them in the oven for around 10 mins until they’re cooked through, but still holding their shape, and have released a small amount of their pale yellow juices into the tin.
2 While the greengages are cooking, mix together the cream cheese, honey, and sea salt. In doing this the cream cheese will loosen a little, so put it back in the fridge to firm up until you’re ready to serve. Lightly toast the bread and set aside to cool.
3 To assemble, simply spread a spoonful or two of the honeyed cream cheese onto a piece of toast. Top with the roasted greengages and spoon over any juices from the tin, plus an extra drizzle of honey if the fruit is a little on the tart side. Scatter over a pinch of the herb flowers to finish (you’ll only need a tiny amount – use them like a seasoning).
Cook’s note: This is best served with the toast and cream cheese cool and the greengages still slightly warm.
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Photography: Jonathan Cherry
Only in Britain could posters go up all over the countryside for cheese-rolling contests, scarecrow competitions and lawnmower races, and no one turn a single hair. As a nation, we’ve proudly kept many of our stranger folk traditions, and added a few new ones along the way.
If you’re looking for a day out with a difference this summer (or even some that comply with social distancing or that you could recreate at home), we’ve gathered a few ideas here. If you thought well-dressing and morris dancing was niche, prepare to be folking astounded.
Toe Wrestling
The World Toe Wrestling Championships is held in Derbyshire every July. It began in 1976 when a few friends down the pub were lamenting Britain’s lack of athletics success. Forty-four years later, it’s going strong and is held in the Bentley Brook Inn in Fenny Bentley most years. Bare-footed participants lock big toes over a tiny wrestling arena and compete to wrangle the other’s foot to the side first. The rules are similar to arm wrestling and you start with right feet, then swap to left, then back again. Be warned - toe wrestling has regularly ended in injury and even broken toes, so go easy if you’re holding your own championships at home. Or perhaps try Thumb Wars instead.
Bog Snorkelling
What better way to spend August Bank Holiday than snorkelling in a peat bog? Don’t answer that, but in case you were wondering, bog snorkelling is an event during which participants compete to do two lengths (60 yards each) of a water-filled trench cut through a peat bog, wearing snorkels and flippers. Swimming strokes may not be used - you may travel by means of flipper power alone. The Waen Rhydd peat bog near Llanwrtyd Wells in mid Wales has hosted the annual World Bog Snorkelling Championship since 1985. If you can’t make it there, perhaps get the paddling pool out at home.
The Burryman’s Parade
At a loose end on the second Friday of August? Fancy seeing a grown man covered head to toe in sticky burrs paraded around for nine hours, his arms supported on poles decorated with flowers? Then head to South Queensferry on the south bank of the Firth of Forth, where the Burryman (a human covered in sticky flower and seed heads from the burdock plant is guided through town, stopping at inns and alehouses and given drinks of whisky (through a straw to avoid the burrs) at each. Folklore tells that bad luck will befall the town if the Burryman is not given whisky and money each year, in a tradition that’s thought to be thousands of years old. We’ll give the whisky a go and leave the burrs on the plant, we think - they’re a devil to get out of wool.
Hallaton Hare Pie Scramble and Bottle-Kicking
Once described as ‘the bloodiest event in England’ this contest between the villages of Medbourne and Hallaton in Leicestershire is not for the faint-hearted. The competition, on Easter Monday, opens with a parade and large hare pie being blessed by a vicar, then cut up and thrown into the assembled crowd. There follows a race to get one of the barrels of beer (a bottle) over the other village’s boundary by any means, including kicking, throwing and rolling. It’s a terrifying free-for-all that makes a game of rugby look like a crochet circle in a nunnery. We aren’t sure this is one you’d want to try at home but there’s nothing to stop you making a rabbit pie and playing skittles with some beer bottles in the garden.
Burning of Bartle
If Guy Fawkes’ Night is not enough dangerous drunken revelry close to open flames for you in one calendar year, you might like to mark Burning Bartle weekend, held on the Saturday closest to St Bartholomew’s Day (24th August) in West Witton, North Yorkshire. Bartle is thought to have been a sheep stealer who was caught some centuries back (us British do enjoy a grudge as well as a weird festival, don’t we?). Today the village marks it by creating a huge effigy of Bartle, much like a ‘Guy’, complete with mask, sheep’s wool hair and beard and glowing eyes (just to terrify any tourists not in the know, we suppose), which is then propped against a dry stone wall and set on fire to much singing and shouting, before everyone decamps to the pub. It’s certainly a niche celebration but we all have a Bartle in our lives, somewhere. Make your own effigy, have a bonfire and sit and enjoy your grudge over a beer or two in the comfort of your own garden. Glowing eyes optional.
In our July issue you’ll find the first in our new series, Modern Eccentrics, in which we celebrate people who are passionate about their pastimes and happily doing things a bit differently. This month, Julian Owen meets some thoroughly modern morris dancers.
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Photography: Cathy Pyle
Give the classic lemonade lolly a refreshing twist, and add a cheeky shot of gin if you like, too
Make your own sophisticated lollies and you’ll never again need to wait for the cacophanous tinkle of the ice-cream van, and be disappointed by its saccharine-sweet, slightly melty offerings. Fill your freezer instead with raspberry, bee pollen and honey yoghurt or mango, ginger and lime lollies, chunky orange dark chocolate ice cream or spiced berries sorbet. All the recipes, by Cathy Pyle, are in our July issue, which is on sale now. And because we can’t bear to see any grown-up without a lolly, here’s a recipe from the feature to whet your appetite:
Makes 6
350ml traditional lemonade (use a brand that contains real lemons if possible)
1 small cucumber, thinly sliced
25g fresh mint leaves
1 Pour the lemonade into the moulds until they are half full.
2 Drop in 3-4 cucumber slices per lolly and some torn mint leaves.
3 Top up the moulds with lemonade and freeze overnight.
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Photography: Tim Smith Project: Karen Dunn
Put your best foot forward and make your own espadrilles in an afternoon
In our July Unwind issue we have a lovely how-to on making your very own pair of espadrilles. Below are the printables for the patterns you will need to make them and you can find all the instructions starting on page 39 of the July issue.
We only recently learned this nifty trick for drying espadrilles that get caught in a rain shower - stuff them with scrunched up newspaper to help them dry out without shrinking or wrinkling.
If you don’t have a copy of the issue, you can buy it from our online shop or in shops now. Here’s a list of the rest of the things you’ll need so you can start gathering them now:
Espadrille soles – we got ours from prym.com
Outer fabric – 1 fat quarter (approx. 55x50cm)
Lining fabric – 1 fat quarter (approx. 55x50cm)
Needle Embroidery thread (or strong thread)
Pins
Fabric
Scissors
Knitting needle
Iron
Sewing machine (optional – can be sewn by hand)
Pattern templates (above)
As created by reader Louise Ashcroft, in response to our ‘Make us a mix tape competition’:
“This mixtape is called Sunshine and Moonbeams, because, in all the heartache, confusion, the isolation, the struggle, the surrender, the sun and the moon have been a constant. So, here's a playful playlist to soothe and inspire. Some songs are there to uplift and bathe in musical sunshine. Then there are songs like Upside down, The Man with the big sombrero and A moment to Myself , which are more about looking after yourself, making your own sunshine and tuning into your own groove. There are tracks that call for your best shimmy, jazz hands, finger clicks, and some that ask you to surrender to the groove. Then there are a few moments to catch a deep breath, a smile, a hug.”
Listen here: Sunshine and Moonbeams .
Photography: Plain Picture
Because it’s a skill everyone should be able to surprise their friends with
Our July cover photo had us all wanting to invest in a hula hoop and rotate our hips like hula-pros. So we thought we’d put together a short guide on how to get started with hula hooping.
Invest in the correct-sized hula hoop - you need one that comes up to your belly button when it is standing on the floor in front of you.
Once you have your hula hoop, hold it in front of you and step inside the hoop with your feet towards the back. Bring the hoop to your waist level with two hands and stand your feet shoulder width apart.
Keep your body long and give the hoop a big flat spin and then start to push forwards and backwards. If you’re right-handed spin it anticlockwise. If you’re left-handed spin it clockwise. Keep your knees, chest and hips still and just move the belly and back if you can.
Move your waist in a circular motion, moving your belly froward as it crosses your front and pushing backwards as it crosses your back. You need to move the part of your body you want the hoop to sit on and keep the other areas still as much as you can.
Put one foot in front of the other if it feels easier. If you feel the hoop starting to drop, go faster, or turn your body in the same direction as the hoop is moving while pushing faster.
Once you’ve got the momentum and you can do a few hoops, you can start being fancy. Try taking a step forward and back or moving across the room. Try these tricks for beginners if you like.
Photograh: Matt Sweeting Photography
Established in 2011, Blackdown Shepherd Huts lovingly design and build their bespoke hand-crafted living spaces from their workshop in the countryside town of Ilminster, Somerset.
From the outset, Blackdown have been inspired by the shepherd hut’s first creators in Victorian times, when the shepherd, farmer or gamekeeper would build their mobile space with their innate need for flexibility in mind. This inspiration is reflected in Blackdown’s range of designs, like their Modular Turnkey Hut, to name just one of their charming ‘flock’.
Crafted with locally sourced materials, this versatile space planted in your favourite spot in the garden or elsewhere, becomes a sanctuary of calm that brings the senses alive. A colour palette of your choice calms the soul with every glance, the smell of your freshly cut flowers acts as a natural diffuser whilst laying patiently in your hand-crafted kitchen area, ready to be arranged into a bouquet fit for the most important visitor - you.
The tranquil dining nook transforms with a dreamy wall-bed for a heavy head or two to land whilst looking up at the stars through the aptly named stargazer; this signature feature built into the curve of the roof provides a heavenly place to stay connected to the ever-changing nature of the outdoors from the warmth and comfort of the wall-bed. Perfect for dozing off whilst the inevitable mid-summer rain tickles the solid curved glass.
Blackdown Shepherd Huts believe that the balance you crave is in the flexibility of your space and are inspired by how such a discerning space can create a peaceful sanctuary that can meet a range of different needs. Whether you are a garden lover, home worker, family timer, or memory maker, let your sanctuary of balance and peace take shape with a Blackdown Shepherd Hut.
Discover yours and find out more at: blackdownshepherdhuts.co.uk/our-huts/
Photo of the very real Steyning Bookshop, West Sussex
Join us as we browse the shelves of our favourite fictional bookshops
Is there a better place to spend a quiet afternoon than browsing in a really lovely bookshop? One with an expansive fiction section but also some surprises: maybe a really good maps or travel corner or a shelf of cookery books that you can lose an hour in. Browsing in bookshops has been one of the things we have missed most during lockdown, so we’re pleased to see them beginning to open up.
This week is Independent Bookshops week and there are many ways to support your local emporium of words, from buying books from them online or over the phone to purchasing book tokens to be spent there in the future when browsing will hopefully be back to normal. In the meantime, we’ve been reminiscing about our favourite bookshops from books, TV and films. Here are a few we remember fondly…
Located at the eponymous 84, Charing Cross Road, Marks & Co is a bit of an interloper in this list, as it wasn’t fictional at all. But it’s surely one of the most famous bookshops from a book ever to exist so we had to include it here. For those who haven’t yet read it (and it is a case of yet - you really must read it) the book is a collection of letters between the author, Helene Hanff, and the staff of Marks & Co, primarily Frank Doel. New Yorker Hanff wrote to the bookshop having heard they were specialists in out of print books, to ask for a number of titles she couldn’t get in the US. From there began a correspondence that spanned two decades. Sadly, by the time Helene made it to England the shop had just closed its doors for the final time, but the shop lives on in her book which was eventually published in 1971 and later became a film (starring Anthony Hopkins and Anne Bancroft) and a screenplay.
This warm early noughties sit com, created by Dylan Moran and Graham Linehan, followed the lives of irascible bookshop owner Bernard Black, his assistant Manny and friend and neighbour Fran. The real star of the show, however, was the London bookshop itself. Infested with vermin and other creatures unknown, filthy to the extent of being unlivable, and languishing in a permanent fug of Bernard’s cigarette smoke and alcohol fumes, for some reason we all wanted to own Black Books, too. We’re still not sure why, but there it is.
William Thacker’s (Hugh Grant’s) bookshop in the film Notting Hill was a charming emporium with the sort of romantic atmosphere that only comes with being in a beautiful building surrounded by enchanting tales from across the globe. So it’s no wonder American superstar Ann falls for the slightly bumbling English eccentric Will. We’d probably all be endlessly attractive if we all owned such as bookshop. The real-life location (142 Portobello Road) has actually never been a bookstore, but The Travel Book Co was based on the real-life Travel Bookshop nearby at 13 Blenheim Crescent.
No bookshop makes us want to go straight back to school more than Flourish & Blotts of Diagon Alley from the Harry Potter stories: ‘The shelves were packed to the ceiling with books as large as paving stones bound in leather, books the size of postage stamps covered in silk, books full of peculiar symbols and a few books with nothing in them at all…’ The owners are regularly confounded by titles such as The Invisible Book of Invisibility, which appears never to have turned up, and The Monster Book of Monsters, copies of which attack the manager and tear each other to pieces. Just magic.
From Am I Overthinking This by Michelle Rial (Chronicle Books)
We’ve reached the end of our June issue this week. We' hope you’ve enjoyed reading it as much as we enjoyed making it.
Here’s the image from our back cover: in many ways a poignant one this month. With all the bad and frightening things there are in the world, a reminder to take action while remaining calm and staying angry (in a useful and positive way) is pretty timely. We were remided that it’s ‘doing’ that changes things, even when our actions may be quiet and small.
Our July issue is out soon. We can’t wait to share it with you.
Pink wafer or Tunnocks caramel? Which is the King of the Scottish wafer biscuits?
Our June Miscellany page features some of our most loved biscuits and there was some heated discussion among The Simple Things’ team about which biscuit was best. So we decided the only fair way to settle it was in a head-to-head debate. We’ve pitted two Scottish champions against each other: the pink wafer biscuit and the Tunnocks wafer. Below you can read the (very serious) debates on both sides, and then do cast your vote, on our blog or on our Facebook or Instagram feeds so we can crown one or other the winner. Now it’s over to the biscuits…
Originally created by Crawfords in Edinburgh and latterly by United Biscuits, the pink wafer is a children’s party staple and a secret favourite among adults, too. Who could resist that lighter-than-air first bite and the way the leaves of wafer melt biddably into your mouth?
Built from layers of dyed pink wafer (because it’s nice to make an effort isn’t it?) interlaced with vanilla cream, the pink wafer looks as attractive as it tastes delicately sweet. Chunky, clumpy biscuits (we’re looking at you, Tunnocks) might be satisfying but they’re nothing to look at are they? The pink wafer, meanwhile, brings colour, fine texture and, might we say, a little glamour to a plated array of digestives, Malted Milks and the like. They are the biscuit one can rely on to ‘lift’ the rest of the plate.
So delicate are they, it has often been argued they are more of a cake. Pish and fie is what we say to this; the wafer is a recognised subset of biscuits and what’s more, it fulfils the brief well. If we wanted something chewy, we would buy a flapjack. If we wanted something chocolatey we’d visit a sweetshop instead. Wafer biscuits should be crips, meltingly delicate and light, and the pink wafer ticks every box. This house believes wafers should be wafers.
The Tunnocks Caramel Wafer
When we reach for a biscuit, we don’t want some mimsy bit of confectionery that you could inhale without noticing, we want something filling, something substantial, something that can be dunked briefly in a cup of tea without fear of biscuit decomposition.
If that’s what you demand from your biscuits too then the Tunnocks caramel wafer is the only wafer biscuit to consider. Another Scottish invention (St Andrew’s University has its own Tunnocks Caramel Wafer Appreciation Society - and so it should), it’s been proudly displayed in its geometric gold and red wrapping since 1956.
The bar is made up of five layers of wafer, with four layers of caramel between, wrapped in a thin layer of chocolate. And that’s where it has the edge over the pink wafer. If they’d only thought to dip them in chocolate, pink wafers would not get nearly so stale and slightly soggy as they occasionally do. Not so the Tunnocks.
Secondly, the addition of the sticky caramel gives the Tunnocks a far superior, more architectural make-up. The layers of caramel are chewy enough to bond the wafer successfully so you don’t end up with a lapful of crumbs and it also gives your jaws a bit of a work-out. Because we all know that the best store cupboard treats make your mouth hurt just a little (see also Pickled Onion Monster Munch and Twiglets).
In conclusion, where the pink wafer is an amuse bouche (and amusing it may be) the Tunnocks Caramel Wafer is practically a meal. We rest our case.
These biscuits are the work of Charlotte Farmer. You can buy her artwork at charlottefarmer1.etsy.com or follow her on Instagram, @lottiefarmer7 . You can see more of her biscuit illustrations in our June issue.
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There’s something special about reading in a railway carriage. Perhaps it’s the rhythm of the ‘faster than fairies, faster than witches’ carriages rattling along as you read, or maybe it’s the way the countryside unrolls like a plot as you go. We have a particular penchant for reading a railway-based book on a train journey. So we’ve matched a few books with a few train journeys to inspire you. Think of it like a cheese and wine pairing, but with choo-choos and words.
Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone
Read it: on any train from platform nine or ten at King’s Cross, London.
Bring with you: Chocolate Frogs and Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans.
If you can’t locate Platform nine-and-three-quarters simply enjoy chugging out of this magnificent station, pretending you’re on your way to Hogwarts for the first time.
Murder on the Orient Express
Read it: on the Istanbul to Paris line via Belgrade.
Bring with you: a pipe and a handkerchief embroidered with the letter H.
Get your little grey cells to work as you relive the great age of steam through Agatha Christie’s 1934 crime novel.
The Railway Children
Read it: On the Keighley and Worth Valley Railway at Oakworth Railway Station.
Bring with you: Apple Pie (for breakfast). How perfectly ripping.
Feel your heart swell with a love of steam as you read the immortal opening line: ‘They were not Railway Children to begin with.’
Strangers on a Train
Read it: On a train from New York to Texas
Bring with you: a good alibi.
Eye up your fellow passengers and mull over which might be best at committing the perfect murder while you settle into Patricia Highsmith’s fabulous 1950 thriller.
The Girl on the Train
Read it: on a commuter train from Buckinghamshire to Euston.
Bring with you: gin in a tin for the journey home.
Nose in a few kitchens and back gardens as you pass through suburbia and enjoy making up backgrounds for the lives of the people whose houses you pass. There’s nothing like a train for people-watching.
The picture above by Andreas Von Einsiedel is from our Home Tour feature in our June issue - a house built around a railway carriage! If you like the idea of escaping to a railway carriage for a weekend, you might like to know you can stay in the house itself, The Bolthole, in Pagham, West Sussex.
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Embroidery by The Profanity Embroidery Group, Whitstable
In 1785, Captain Francis Grose compiled A Classical Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue – an impressive compilation of the choice vocabulary he heard in the less genteel areas of London. It’s still in print (a pocket version was published by Chronicle Books earlier this year) and is testament to the values of its time – and the evolving wonders of the English language. A few choice definitions follow:
A BLOWSE or BLOWSABELLA: A woman whose hair is dishevelled, and hanging around her face; a slattern
BUMFIDDLE: The backside, the breech.
CATCH FART: A footboy: so called from such servants commonly following close behind their master or mistress.
CRINKUM CRANKUM: A woman’s commodity
FLASH LINGO: The canting or slang language
GOTCH-GUTTED: Pot-bellied: a gotch in Norfolk signifying a pitcher, or a large round jug.
JOHNNY BUM: A he or jack ass; so called by a lady that affected to be extremely polite and modest, who would not say jack because it was vulgar, nor ass because it was indecent.
JUST-ASS: A punning appellation for a justice.
NOB: The head
TALLYWAGS or TARRYWAGS: A man’s testicles.
If a bit of a swear-up makes you feel better occasionally you are not alone and you might like to read our feature Strong Words on p44 of our June issue by Frances Ambler. It features lots of examples of the ways in which swearing can be good for you, including a look at the work of Whitstable’s Profanity Emrboidery Group (pictured above) - @pegwhistable
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Photography: Steve Painter
Fragrant frangipane, crunchy almonds and no sickly sweet fondant in sight makes a lovely tea-time treat
Makes 12
For the sweet pastry base:
200g plain flour
50g ground almonds
75g caster sugar
160g salted butter (at room temperature), cubed
1 egg yolk
For the Filling:
150g raspberry jam
130g salted butter, softened
160g caster sugar
4 eggs
260g ground almonds
40g flaked almonds, to decorate
1. To make the base, put the flour, ground almonds and caster sugar in a bowl and combine. Add the butter and use your fingertips to rub it into the mixture until it resembles breadcrumbs. Add the egg yolk, then mix and knead the dough to create a tight, smooth ball. Wrap in clingfilm and refrigerate for 30 mins. Before use, allow to stand at room temperature for 10-15 mins.
2. Preheat the oven to 170C/Fan 150C/ Gas 3. Roll out the sweet pastry base until it's 5mm thick and use it to line a 34x20cm baking tray, gently pushing it into the edges. Trim off any excess.
3. Prick the base a few times with a fork, then line with baking parchment and fill with baking beans before blind baking for 15-20mins. Leave to cool, but leave the oven on. Once cooled, spread the raspberry jam over the base.
4. To make the filling, cream together the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then add the ground almonds and whisk thoroughly.
5. Spoon the filling over the jam base right up to the edges. Sprinkle over the flaked almonds, then bake for 30-35 mins until golden on top and firm in the middle. Cool before cutting into 12 slices.
This recipe is from the June issue of The Simple Things. If you fancy a little something sweet the issue also has recipes for a yarrow cake, crab apple tarte tatin, meringue kisses and more.
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Taken from Artisan Home Baking: Wholesome and Delicious Recipes for Cakes and Other Bakes – Recipes from Meg Rivers, Bakers of Happiness (Ryland Peters & Small) Photography: Steve Painter
Paper bird by Zack McLaughlin
How some country-dwelling birds moved to the big smoke
We live in strange times and the beasts among us that are adaptable are those that will likely emerge the strongest.
Take the peregrine, for example; just a few decades ago, this magnificent cliff-dweller was dwindling in number in the UK, due to the (now banned) pesticide DDT. But now they’re back, and they’ve moved upmarket, taking up residence in some of the most sought-after buildings in our cities.
When Battersea Power Station was renovated and became luxury flats the first family through the door was a pair of peregrines. Unfortunately, they chose to nest in one of the chimneys that was about to be taken down and rebuilt. Peregrines are no respecters of a rising housing market. The development company had to - at a cost of £100,000 - build a mast next to the chimney with a nesting box and pray that the birds would relocate there for their next nesting season. Fortunately the peregrines acquiesced - perhaps Sarah Beeney had a word - and they’ve remained there since.
City slicker peregrines have been spotted circling St Paul’s, diving for prey from cranes and generally cavorting all over the city. The cathedrals, cranes and chimneys from which they nest and hunt are their new cliff faces. And they’re enjoying city life very nicely, thank you. It’s thought the rise in numbers is accounted for by the large numbers of feral pigeons available for them to eat.
But it’s not just in London that peregrines are settling down to city life. They’ve also nested successfully for many years in Norwich Cathedral spire, at St John’s in Bath, in Manchester skyscrapers, on Nottingham Trent University and even on a phone mast in Southampton.
If you live in a city and are a lover of large birds, just look up, up, up. You might just find a peregrine looking back at you, beady of eye.
If you like the feathered chap above, you might be interested to know he was made entirely of paper and is the work of Zack McLaughlin os paperandwood.co.uk. You can see more paper birds from page 20 of our June issue.
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We celebrate slowing down, enjoying what you have, making the most of where you live, enjoying the company of of friends and family, and feeding them well. We like to grow some of our own vegetables, visit local markets, rummage for vintage finds, and decorate our home with the plunder. We love being outdoors and enjoy the satisfaction that comes with a job well done.
